Momma and Daddy Are What?
by Lady Lily of Darkness
Summary: Maybe OOC, and A/U. Takes place after Breaking Dawn. A mixed rating between "K " and "T". Canon pairings. Full Summary is in the beginning of the story. STATUS: Now on HIATUS!
1. Bella? Edward?

**Alrighty, readers! I know that some of you are probably getting annoyed at me right now, but I have another brand new story that I really, really, REALLY want to start!**

**I've had this story idea on my mind for quite some time, but I was struggling of what to actually do. I mean, I had the main idea all figured out, but then, I was stumped. :(**

**But, now I have it all figured out! :)**

**So, I'll just tell you right now what this story is going to be. This story is going to be about...**

**Baby Edward and Baby Bella!**

**Here's the summary for you:**

_OOC, and maybe A/U_: Takes place after BD. (They're all still in Forks.) Things have gone back to normal around in Forks - or as normal as you can guess it can get. Anyway, a certain group of vampire teen parents, with their Vampire-Human Hybrid daughter, and their shape-shifting pal alongside them, go out on a normal routine hunting trip together. But, something strange happens when the hunt is over. Just what has happened, you may ask? What will be in store for the Cullens, Jacob's pack and Reneesme, when they are left with a faint and unfamiliar vampire scent, and two little human babies who look just like two of their own? Join in on the adventures of raising a Baby Bella, and a Baby Edward. Will these two ever get back to being how ther were in the beginning? And who did this to Bella and Edward?

**So, the story is going to be rated between K+ to T. :)**

**Now, let's get started...**

***Temp Title - This was the best title I could come up with. :(***

****The POV may switch between the Cullen Family members, to Jacob, to Reneesme - to anybody really. We'll just see how the story will play out.****

*****DISCLAIMER: I wish that I could own SM's world of vampires, love and such, but sadly I don't. :(*****

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_**Momma and Daddy Are What?**_

**Chapter One**

**~Bella Cullen~**

"Alice, how many times do I have to say that I'm not wearing a cocktail dress ever again while I go hunting?" I asked her exasperatedly, while I glared at her and the skimpy dress in her hands. "Bella, I keep telling you over and over again, that you'll look fabulous in a cocktail dress! Come on, please wear it." Alice begged, looking at me with sad golden eyes. "No, Alice. I'm fine going hunting in what I'm wearing right now, so just please put that dress away. I promise to wear it next time." I pleaded with her, and instantly, her pixie face perked right up.

"Okay!" she chirped, and she danced off to put the absurdity of a dress away, while I exited her room, to find Edward outside, Reneesme at his feet, her tiny hand in his. "Ready to go, love?" Edward asked me, coming over to where I was and pecking my cheek. "Yep." I answered, bending down and picking Reneesme up in my arms, and we walked down to the first level.

Today was like any other day for my family and I. After the Volturi have left Forks, things for us were back to normal - or at least more so as normal as a family of vampires, with a shape-shifter in love with your Human-Vampire Hybrid daughter, can get. But, still, it was pretty normal for us. Alice, Rosalie and Esme were going to go shopping - again - while Carlisle, Emmett and Jasper were going to go out with them, since Alice insists that they have someone carry the bags of clothing. That left Edward, Reneesme, Jacob and I to go hunting, before Jacob, Seth and Leah were going to stay at the house to watch over Reneesme while Edward and I would have some alone time back at the cottage.

"Bye guys!" Emmett yelled to us on our way out the back door. We said goodbye to our family, and went outside, where Jacob - in his werewolf form - was waiting for us. "Jakey!" Reneesme squealed, where Edward let her run off to where he was, and our daughter pounced on the giant wolf. I looked over at Edward, to see his usual scowl on his face. "Edward, don't start." I reminded him, rolling my eyes. Every time we see Reneesme with Jacob, he just has to get that scowl on his face.

"I'm not going to argue, love. You just know how I feel about the dog." Edward grumbled to me, shaking his head. "Come on; the sooner we get our hunting all done, the sooner we get to go have our alone time." I said, walking down the steps of the back patio of the Cullen Mansion. That perked him right up - the insatiable vampire, he is - and he reminded the werewolf and our daughter that we needed to get going on our hunt.

As soon as we were in the trees, we caught wind of a pack of deer and elk, and our hunt started. 3 elk later, Edward and I moved over to a more secluded area - well, he dragged me to it. I knew this vampire was getting a tad bit impatient. We kissed and let our hands roam over each other, when I heard a noise of someone moving. "Did you hear that?" I asked him. "Hmm?" Edward hummed, distracted since he was nuzzling my neck with that nose of his.

Again, I heard the noise. "There it was again." I said, where Edward sighed and leaned away. "Love, I think you're hearing noises. I hear nothing at all." Edward said, raising an eyebrow at me. "Uh, you're probably right." I mumbled; maybe I was just hearing things right now. "Come on. Let's go find Jacob and Nessie, so we can get back to the cottage." Edward said, laughing lightly when I groaned at him using that dreaded nickname that he used for Reneesme. What is wrong with just saying her name? Our poor baby would be forever labeled as the Loch Ness Monster.

Edward began leading me out of the secluded area, when this time, I heard that noise - and it was much louder. "Okay, now I hear what you were hearing." Edward stated, whipping around to the direction of the noise. "See, I'm not crazy." I mumbled to myself, getting ready to fight off whoever was messing with us.

"Bella?" I looked over at Edward when he said my name; the way he said it. It sounded like he was getting tired, or somehow just weak. "What?" I asked him, and then I realized that it now felt as if my energy was being sucked out of me. We collapsed to the ground in the middle of our secluded area, on our backs and holding hands. "I feel... sleepy..." Edward mumbled, his golden eyes slowly closing. "Me... too..." I agreed, and there, my eyes closed, and I fell into darkness.

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**~Jacob Black~**

"Jakey, look at me!" I looked up at Nessie when I heard her squeal, and there I saw her tiny little form jumping from a high branch up in a tree, and flew over to another tree. I released a throaty wolf chuckle, staring up at the little Hybrid I imprinted on when she was just born. Little Nessie was always the one for fun and thrills, and of course, I was much like her leech of a father; always worrying for her safety.

_Worrying about your little bloodsucker again, Jakey-poo? _Seriously? Jakey-poo? That's the best Leah could come up with for me? _So, you have finally resorted to that name, Leah? _I asked her sarcastically through my mind. _Just ignore Leah, Jake. She's being crabby again. _Seth thought towards me. _That time of the month, eh, Leah? _I thought towards her, where I barked out my wolf chuckle again.

_Shut up, Jake. _Leah thought bitterly. "Jake, where's Momma and Daddy? We've been hunting for a while now, and I thought they said that they would come find us." Nessie said to me suddenly, where I saw that she was in front of my wolf form, an adorable sad pout. _Come to think of it, I don't hear them. _Seth commented. _Ew; you listen to them? _I thought to Seth. Gross; why would he want to hear vampires doing that? _Bow-chicka-wow-wow. _Leah thought, laughing in our mind connection.

_You two are sick. I meant that I would usually hear them running around here. But, I don't hear anything. In fact, I don't smell their scent either. _Seth explained. I sniffed the air, with Nessie doing the same, and I also couldn't smell their vampire sickly-sweet scent either. I rose to my feet - er, paws - and motioned for Nessie to hop onto my wolf back. She hopped on, and wrapped her tiny arms around my thick neck, and there, I took off to begin searching for Bella and Edward.

_Why am I hearing some babies crying? _Leah thought. "Jake, why are there babies in the forest?" Nessie asked me over the winds. I perked my ears, and there, over the winds, I could hear two distinct babies' wails. _Let's phase and see if we can find these babies we're hearing. _Seth suggested, and there, I heard through my mind Leah and Seth phasing. I set Nessie down, and had her turn around, before I phased back into my human self, and pulled on my shorts.

"I hear the babies over here, Jakey." Nessie said to me, where she skipped off over to my left. I followed after her, and we walked a little path to a secluded little area where it was like a mini meadow or something or other. "Wait; aren't those Momma's and Daddy's clothes?" Nessie whispered to me, where I looked over into the meadow, and saw that there were two piles of clothing - the same clothing that Bella and Edward were wearing earlier.

"Stay here for a second, Nessie. I'll let you know when you can come over." I ordered her, moving through the bushes and over to the piles, just as Seth and Leah appeared from in front of me, in human form and with clothes on. "Are those clothes moving?" Leah asked, pointing down to the piles. I looked down, and saw that there was movement underneath both piles of clothing. I bent over Bella's clothing, while Seth bent over Edward's, and together, we moved the shirts off.

"Oh, my god." Leah gasped, staring wide eyed at the two little babies, just like how Seth and I were.

For me, I was staring down at a tiny pale baby girl, that had ear-length brown curly hair, and a red face because she was crying and wailing like crazy. She wore a diaper, and little pink socks on her tiny feet. When the shirt was removed, the baby girl looked up at me with curious brown eyes, only tears on her face. I knew those brown eyes anywhere.

"Bella?" I asked in shock. The baby girl reached forwards with her tiny arms, as if that was her acknowledgment to her hearing her name. I moved around a bit, and picked the baby up, holding her at arm's length. "Dude, I think this is Edward." Seth muttered, where I looked over at Seth to see him holding up a baby boy that had Edward's messy bronze hair. The baby wasn't as pale as the Vampire Edward that we knew, but he was still pale. And, after Seth turned him around, he stared at me with green eyes.

"Ella?" the baby boy asked, pointing a baby finger over at baby Bella in my arms. "Edar?" Bella asked in her baby voice. "Well, that settles it. This is Edward and Bella." Seth stated, nodding his head from these two's recognitions with each other. I set Bella down, and there, she crawled over to Edward on her hands and knees, to her husband who was in an diaper much like hers, only he had green socks on his feet. Edward and Bella met each other in the middle, and they hugged each other after they sat on their little butts.

"Okay, as much as I hated these two before, I have to admit - this looks so cute." Leah admitted to us, walking over to where we were. "That's Momma and Daddy?" Nessie asked above us, standing beside Seth. "Nessie." I groaned; why doesn't she listen? "Nessay!" Bella and Edward squealed to their daughter. "They know me!" Nessie squealed, and plopped herself in front of her parents, kissing their foreheads.

"So, what are we going to do with these two?" Seth asked me. "Well, first, we got to gather their old clothes up, with their rings and phones, and we go back to the cottage so we can get them some baby clothes to wear. No way are they going to stay warm in diapers and socks." I explained, standing up. "I'll gather their things. You and Seth take Edward, Bella and Nessie back to the cottage. I'll meet you there." Leah explained, walking over to the piles of clothing and began gathering them up.

I picked Bella up while Seth picked Edward up. There was whimpering from being separated, on both of their parts, but with us walking side-by-side and with Bella's head resting on my left side of my torso, she and Edward held hands together while leaning away from our chests. "Why are they doing that?" Seth asked me when he noticed that they wouldn't lean back, and that they kept kissing each other on their cheeks. "First of all, we're 108 degrees, Seth. They're human babies. And second of all, since they are married, and that they love each other, I'm sure that while they're babies, they'll be doing this non-stop." I explained to him, chuckling.

"So, Momma and Daddy are babies?" Nessie asked from my right side, skipping alongside with me and keeping up with our pace. "Yep. We're not sure why they're babies, but we'll figure it out once your other family members get home." Seth explained to Nessie. "Oh, man." I groaned out, causing everyone to look at me funny. "How the heck are they going to deal with human babies Bella and Edward, Seth? What if one of them freak out, or what if they attack them?" I asked him, and he sighed.

"I don't think they would hurt these two, Jacob. They'll probably freak out when they see them as babies, but hopefully we'll be able to figure out what we're going to do with them." Seth said, shrugging.

We reached their cottage, and walked inside, heading towards Nessie's bedroom. We sat them down on her toddler bed, and immediately they sat up and kind of cuddled with each other - but seeing babies cuddle? Now that's somewhat of a freaky sight if you ask me. "I find some baby clothes!" Seth yelled to me after he was done sifting through Nessie's closet. "You don't have to yell, dumbass." I hissed at him after I was beside him.

Seth straightened up, and held up two little baby outfits. One was a dress, while the other was some pants and a plain green shirt. "Weird; thought that the Pixie would have Nessie only in dresses." I mumbled, shrugging my shoulders. We walked back over to Baby Bella and Baby Edward on the bed, who was being entertained by Nessie at the moment. We easily got Edward dressed in his pants and shirt. Bella was more of a challenge, because she wouldn't stop squirming, but we eventually got her in the dress.

"I put their clothes away in their closet, and I have their rings stowed away in one of the bedside tables." Leah suddenly said from behind us, making Bella and Edward jump. "Okay, now that they're dressed, and every little personal item is stowed away for now, we need to try calling the others." I instructed. "I've tried calling either of the leeches, but I get only their voicemail immediately." Leah explained.

"They must've turned their phones off because they knew that Edward and Bella probably didn't want to be disturbed during their quality time here, so they probably knew that they shouldn't call them." Seth offered. "And since we're wolves, the Psychic hasn't seen these two being turned into babies." I added, groaning and smacking my forehead. "So now what?" Leah asked.

Abruptly we heard little rumbles coming from the bed, and we all looked over to see Bella and Edward staring down at their stomachs with red cheeks. "Uh, tell me that they're not going to break wind." Seth hissed. More grumbling came from them, while they poked their own stomachs. "Sillies. Momma and Daddy are hungry." Nessie informed us, and kissed her parents' foreheads.

"As in hungry for food, right?" Leah asked. As if she heard her, Bella looked up and with her little mouth opened, she pointed to it, whimpering. "That's a yes to being hungry for food." Seth stated, nodding.

"Alright, let's get back to the Cullen Mansion, and two of us should go out and get some food for these two, while one of us stay behind and watch over the kids." I ordered, moving over to the bed and picked Bella up, while Seth picked Edward up. All together in our group, we left the cottage, locking it up for now, and headed down the pathway, towards the direction of the Cullen Mansion.

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**Ta-Da! So, what'cha think of this new story?**

**I'm so into baby stories at this moment - mainly any Baby Bella, and Baby Edward stories. I find them the most adorable. XD**

**So, what do you really think of it? Good? Bad? **

**Please let me know in a review! Show little Baby Bella and Baby Edward some love! **

**Bye for now,**

**~*Lady Lily of Darkness*~ **


	2. Plans

**Alrighty readers! It's time for a new chapter of "Momma and Daddy Are What?"**

**I have most of the story planned out, along with most of the POVs, so yeah. :) I just know that I'll have fun writing with babies Bella and Edward. :D**

**Thanks for the reviews so far. I'm glad that there are some readers who would love to see what will happen next in this new story of mine. **

**So, let's get started with Chapter Two!**

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**Chapter Two**

**~Jacob Black~**

We finally made it back to the bloodsuckers' mansion, with Bella's and Edward's stomachs grumbling non-stop. "Okay, so you two can go get the food for Bella and Edward, while I'll stay behind and watch over these three." I instructed to Leah and Seth. "What food do we have to get?" Seth asked. "Go to like McDonalds or something, and get some of those nuggets and fries or something. Get some juice too." I told them, shrugging my shoulders. Like I knew what babies should eat.

"Alright." Leah said, rolling her eyes before she and her brother walked around the house so they could go drive one of the Cullens' cars; Seth had already handed Edward over to me before they left. I walked towards the house, and let Nessie jump up onto the back patio. Then, I followed her carefully - I have two babies in my arms, remember? - and there, we walked inside the house through the door that led into the living room.

"So, Nessie, do you know what entertains babies?" I asked her. "Well, letting them watch TV helps." Nessie said, shrugging her shoulders. "Alright." I stated, and set Bella and Edward on the couch - they immediately scooted closer together, and Edward wrapped his tiny baby arm around his wife's waist - while I turned on the large screen TV. "Change it to some kid show." Nessie told me when she saw that the channel was a news channel.

I nodded and changed it off to some channel - the PBS station or whatever crap it was - and there, Bella and Edward began watching the show. "That's it? They just watch TV?" I asked her, raising an eyebrow. "Well, I never found interest in it, but they seem to like it." Nessie said, sitting down beside her mom.

"Nessie, we need to figure out what caused your parents to become babies." I began after I sat down in the seat beside the couch. "Wed eyes." Edward suddenly said. "What?" I asked him. "Wed eyes - pwale skin, twall, but pwetty." Bella said suddenly as well, and then scooted closer to Edward, who of course held her closer to him as well. "Do you have any idea what they're saying?" I asked Nessie, who rolled her eyes at me.

"They said, _"Red eyes - pale skin, tall, but pretty." _It must've been a vampire who turned them into babies." Nessie explained to me. "A vampire? But, we would've smelt this one." I reminded her, scratching my head in confusion. I did pick up a faint scent from where we found Bella and Edward, but it didn't really smell like a leech.

"Let's just wait for the others to come back, and we'll tell them what we've figured out so far." I mumbled; I was too tired to really even try in figuring this crap out myself. Nessie nodded, and turned to watch the show on the TV, with her parents who were laughing and clapping at any of the funny parts. A few minutes later, the door opened. "We got food!" I heard Seth yell out. "Good; I don't know how much longer I could stand hearing these two stomachs grumble." I said out loud, getting up from my seat.

I took the food from Leah, and walked back into the living room. Nessie snatched the bag out of my hands, and then sat the bag between her parents and herself. "Hey, Mom, here's a nugget for you." Nessie said, handing the nugget over to Bella who took it from her. Bella - who had little teeth, surprisingly - where Bella began eating the nugget greedily. "And Dad, here's a nugget for you." Nessie said next, handing a nugget over to Edward - who also had little teeth - and there, he ate the nugget just as hungrily as his wife. "Tank you." Bella and Edward mumbled to us, eating their food with content.

After they were done with their nuggets, Nessie pulled out the box that only had four nuggets in there now, and set it down in front of her parents. They attacked more of the nuggets, while we all had some of the fries. "So, now that these two are being fed, what should we do afterwards?" Seth asked. "Well, obviously, once the other leeches get back, they're going to notice that we have two seemingly human babies on our hands." Leah stated. "Leah, Edward and Bella _are_ human babies." Seth cut in, snickering at her sister.

"Shut it, twerp!" Leah growled at her brother, throwing a fry at him. "Okay, no food fights in here." I ordered them, while I watched with a laugh to see Bella trying to steal Edward's fry. "Mom, there's enough fries for you and Dad." Nessie reminded Bella, giggling down at her. "Hopefully they won't do the old "Lady and the Tramp" bit." Leah grumbled, laughing to herself. "Now that would be funny." Seth muttered, hearing his sister perfectly.

"So, almighty Alpha - what are we going to tell the leeches when they come home to three shape-shifters, one Hybrid, and two human babies?" Leah asked me. "We'll just tell them that Bella and Edward saw a vampire before they became babies; that should be enough explanation to them." I stated. "Wait, these two remember seeing a vampire before they became like this?" Seth asked me. "Yep." Nessie answered for me, while her parents nodded together simultaneously.

"Okay, but what if the leeches don't believe us when we tell them that these two are Bella and Edward?" Leah asked skeptically. "My dear sister, I think that's going to be an easy task." Seth stated in a false - and might I add, very horrible British or English - accent. "How so, Captain Dork?" Leah asked him back sarcastically. "Simple - we have two options." Seth began. "First Option - we have Jacob mess around with Edward - annoy him enough -, and of course since Edward hates Jake, everyone will see the despise Edward has towards Jacob as a baby." Seth explained.

"That sounds like an easy plan." I agreed. "Okay, so that's option number one. What about option number two?" Leah asked. "Option number two is to separate Edward and Bella from each other. One of us is on one side of the room with one baby, and another person is on the opposite side of the room with the other baby. And, I can guarantee that there will be squirming, crying, and screaming on both of their parts from being separated, because everyone knows now that these two hate to be separated." Seth explained.

"We can't do that one though." Nessie protested. "Why not?" I asked her. "I don't want to see my parents sad from being separated like that." Nessie stated with a pout. "Alright, that option will be a last resort in case the leeches aren't convinced." I assured her, where I got up and kissed her forehead, but I jumped back when I felt something thump into my head. I looked up startled, to see Bella looking rather annoyed, while Edward sure as hell looked pissed, standing over his sitting wife on his baby legs.

"No kissy!" Edward yelled at me in his baby boy voice, pointing an accusing finger at me and glaring at me with angry green eyes. "Haha, oh my god! That was so hilarious!" Leah yelled out around her cackles, while Seth was bent over his knees, laughing just like his sister. "Ow! You little vampire twerp!" I hissed, rubbing my head from the pain; what the hell did he throw at me? Did he punch me? Nessie was laughing loudly from the sight of her baby father beating up her shape- shifter friend. "Sit." Bella ordered her husband in her baby girl voice. Edward huffed, and sat down beside her.

"Say sworry." Bella ordered him, pointing a tiny finger over at me. Edward huffed even more, and Bella stared at him with more determination, and pointed over at me. "Sworry." Edward muttered over at with a slight baby growl. "Jakey," Bella began next, looking over at me. "Say sworry too." Bella ordered me in her baby voice. "Why? What for? He's the one who hit me!" I argued, earning more laughs. Bella stared at me with determination in those brown eyes, and pointed over to Edward again. "Ugh, fine; sorry." I grumbled, sitting back with my arms crossed.

"Good." Bella said, a victorious smile on her face, and she turned towards Edward, kissing his cheek and handing him her nugget. Edward smiled, and kissed her cheek, but then he handed the nugget to Nessie. As if she knew what he was asking for, Nessie split the nugget in half and gave a half to her parents. "How did you know he wanted it split in half?" Seth asked after he calmed himself down from laughing so much.

"Well, I know my dad. He wants to make Mom happy, and I just knew that with mom giving dad her nugget, he would want to share it with her." Nessie explained. "Alrighty then." Leah stated, shrugging her shoulders.

We waited in the living room for who knows how long, but then, when we heard the sound of slamming car doors, I sighed. "Time to get the show on the road." I muttered, running a hand through my hair. When the front door opened, Nessie jumped up from the couch, and raced towards whoever was entering the door.

"Hey Nessie." I heard the pixie's voice first. "Hi Aunt Alice, Aunt Rosalie, Grandma." Nessie greeted to at least three of the Cullens who were back. "So, honey, how was your morning?" I heard Blondie ask Nessie. "It was fun. After the hunt, we came back here for some lunch, and to watch some TV. And, also, Daddy hit Jakey on the head after Jakey kissed my forehead; it was funny." Nessie rambled to them.

"That sounds like Edward." I heard the big one - I think his name is Emmett - muttered, where there I smelled the male Cullens coming into the house, and from the rustling noises, it sounds like they did get stuck with carrying the bags. "Yeah. I got to spend the whole morning with Momma and Daddy; they're still in the living room too." Nessie told them. _Well, I guess now is the time to put our plans into action_. I thought to myself, looking over at Edward and Bella who were still watching TV.

"They are?" I heard Emmett ask. "I thought that they would be over at their cottage right now." I heard the Empathy vampire - Jasper - wonder out loud. _Oh boy, are you leeches in for a surprise_. I thought to myself, snickering. "Yeah, they're still here. Come on, say hi to them." Nessie said happily, before she skipped back into the room. "I bet Bella's denying Eddie from his fun." I heard Emmett say, chuckling, before a whack was heard, followed by a quiet, "Ow..."

"Hey mutts." Blondie greeted us. "Hey Rosalie." I muttered. "Wait - did you just call me, Rosalie?" Blondie asked, sounding surprised. "Yeah - got a problem with that?" I asked her; so what if I was calling her that? She's sure going to be calling plenty of other names once she sees her brother and sister-in-law soon.

"Why do I smell a baby?" I heard Emmett ask out loud. "Mom, Dad, the others are back." Nessie said to her parents who were still on the couch, hiding her parents from the others. "Yay!" Bella and Edward said together, clapping their hands. "What the...?" Emmett asked once he heard that. "Nessie, honey, could you move away a bit?" Dr. Fang asked, where I shut off the TV once the whole vampire family were standing in front of it. Nessie nodded to him, and there, she moved away to give full view of Bella and Edward on the couch.

"Whoa - when did we get babies?" Emmett asked, and there, everyone looked over at me accusingly. "What? What are you all looking at me for?" I asked them defensively. "Since we can't get babies, do you mind explaining to us why we have two babies who are human?" the Psychic asked me. "Sheesh people! One: don't look at me like I'm some pedophile," I began, where they rolled their eyes at me. "And Two: take a good look at these babies, and tell me who they look like." I told them.

The leeches then looked back over at Bella and Edward, where Edward was playing with Bella's curly hair, her back against his baby chest. "Oh my! Is that Bella and Edward?" Esme asked with a gasp. "Thank you! At least one vampire knows who their own family members are!" I exclaimed, throwing my hands up in the air exasperatedly; yeesh, these bloodsuckers are so slow. "That can't be them though. I would've seen them being turned into babies." Alice argued. "Shall we show them how this is Bella and Edward?" Leah asked me.

"We shall." I answered, standing up. "Hey Edward." I gained his attention, and there, I kissed Nessie's forehead again, before I jumped and landed down on the ground, startled once again, and glared up at the baby boy who was standing up on the couch with angry green eyes down at me. How the hell does he do that, with such fast speed? Isn't he supposed to be a human baby? "No kissy! Dumb Mutt!" Edward yelled at me with a finger pointing at me.

"Stinkin' little vampire twerp." I grumbled, rubbing my head. "See?" Nessie asked her family, helping her dad sit back down behind her mom, who seemed to sigh at Edward's anger. "Okay, that seems like Edward." Emmett stated with a laugh. "But what about the other baby there? How can we be sure that this is Bella and Edward?" Jasper asked. "Oh no." Seth muttered. "Sorry Nessie, but it's time for the last resort." Leah murmured to Nessie who frowned. "Okay." Nessie mumbled with a pout, looking ready to cry. Leah picked up Bella, and Seth picked up Edward, while I sat down with Nessie on my lap and held her to me.

"Um, what are you doing?" Rosalie asked Leah and Seth. "You asked for it, Cullens." I muttered to them, and watched as Leah stood at one side of the living room with Bella, and Seth stood beside the archway that led to the kitchen. "Alright Bella, Seth is going to leave with Edward, and never come back." Leah stated to Bella with a frown.

"NO!" Bella screamed, squirming in Leah's arms. "No, no, no! Ella! Ella!" Edward screamed, squirming in Seth's arms. "Edar, Edar! I wan EDAR!" Bella wailed, tears now coming out of her eyes. "ELLA!" Edward screeched, also crying like her wife. "Sorry Edward, but you can't be with Bella anymore." Seth mumbled to Edward sadly; this was hurting the kid as much as it was hurting Nessie.

"NOO!" Edward and Bella wailed together, squirming much more in Leah's and Seth's arms, crying uncontrollably. "STOP!" Jasper yelled out, collapsing to the ground on his knees. "Please, put them back together!" Jasper yelled out, and there, Seth and Leah hurried over to the couch, and sat Bella and Edward down beside each other. Immediately, the two babies embraced each other, still crying.

"Convinced enough?" I asked the family, my irritation evident in my question. "Yes, we see that this is Bella and Edward." Carlisle asked, holding Esme who was dry sobbing from hearing Edward's and Bella's cries of fear and pain. Alice left Emmett and Rosalie to comfort Jasper, while she skipped over to the side table, and grabbed some tissues from the tissue box that was there. I grabbed some for Nessie, and made her blow her nose while I wiped away her tears.

"Blow, you two." Alice stated to Edward and Bella, holding two tissues to their noses. They blew their noses, and afterwards, Alice threw the tissues away and grabbed more tears to wipe away their tears. When she was done with that, Alice moved the pillows on the couch around, and made Edward lie back on one side of the pillow against the armrest of the couch, Bella beside him to his right where her back was to the back of the couch. "My Edar." Bella mumbled to Edward. "My Ella." Edward mumbled back, a sleepy smile on his face.

Alice zipped out of the room, and came back with a blanket - a blanket that was used for Nessie when she was a baby, and there, she placed the blanket over the two. Instantly, they cuddled with each other, and fell asleep.

"So, now that they're asleep," Carlisle began, where he sat down in the chair beside the couch. Esme sat on the armchair's armrest, Emmett and Rosalie took up the loveseat, and Jasper sat in another armchair, the pixie sitting on the armrest, and Leah and Seth sat on the floor in front of the couch.

"I would like to know what happened." Carlisle finished.

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**Aw, poor Ed and Bells. :( They were so scared! D: **

**So, what did you all think of this chapter? Does the story still hold interest? **

**Please send Bella and Edward some love in a review - they were told that they would never see each other again; poor babies! :(**

**Bye for now,**

**~*Lady Lily of Darkness*~ **


	3. Settling In

**A/N: Alright, readers. I'm back from the dead. XD**

**I know it's been a long time since I've ever updated a story on FanFiction, but I can honestly say that I had a serious case of writer's block. :( It was a terrible case of it, so I'm going to try and write out this chapter for all of you.**

**Secrets Exposed was deleted, because I had lost my ideas on what to write for the final chapter. So, we're continuing down **_The List_** I had came up with back in DoT.**

**Onward with Chapter 3 of ****Momma and Daddy Are What?**

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**Chapter Three**

**~Jacob Black~**

"What happened to Bella and Edward, Jacob?" Esme asked us softly, glancing over at Bella and Edward who were sleeping soundly on the couch, their soft snores the only sound in the room at the moment. "Apparently, it was a vampire - a human blood drinker at that, that turned them into babies." Seth piped in, shrugging his shoulders.

"What?" Alice cried. "Impossible! I would've been able to see the vampire if that were the case!" Alice hissed, jumping to her feet in a hurry. "Alice, calm down..." Carlisle tried soothing the pixie and her sudden anger. "Alice, the only reason why you didn't see the vampire, was because of the three certain shape-shifters in the room." Blondie pointed out, jutting a thumb in our direction. "What about a scent? Did any of you catch another vampire scent there?" Emmett asked, sidetracking from the main focus for a second.

"We did, but the scent was extremely faint. We could only get a whiff of it, before the trail would disappear." I informed them, sighing. "Maybe your stench wiped clean of the other scent." Rosalie grumbled. "Hey!" "Rosie, babe..." "Rosalie Hale McCarty Cullen - apologize!" Leah, Emmett and Esme all shouted at once.

"No, no. No offense to any of you three, but possibly, your scent did get rid of the nomad scent." Carlisle pondered. "It can't be that; we would've been able to set the vampire scent apart from ours, and yet, still, the scent wasn't strong enough for a complete trail." I grumbled to myself, shaking my head.

"No time to worry about that. We need to go shopping for Bella and Edward. I need to get an entire new wardrobe - shirts, pants, socks, dresses, pajamas with footsies, shoes - and oh! I need to get a little brush, and accessories. I'll also need carriers, high chairs, baby food and baby food related items, a stroller and a crib. Oh, I need so many things, and the mall closes in 3 hours! We better get going!" Alice twittered to the others, pacing up and down, and around, the living room.

"Don't we need _two _strollers, and _two _cribs?" Emmett asked her, scratching his head. "No. You saw the way they acted when separated; it would be stupid to put them in separate strollers and cribs. So, we'll get a big enough crib, and a twin sided stroller - or maybe a large stroller? - and oh; maybe a twin sided carrier/car seat, would work best as well." Alice murmured to herself, tapping her chin.

"Well, all of you, come on!" Alice suddenly yelled, clapping her hands. "What?" Leah asked her. "I need all of you to come with me to the mall, to get some things for these two babies. There's no way I'm doing this by myself, you know." Alice explained to her, already ushering the others out the door, Emmett complaining about going shopping again. "But, who's going to stay and watch the kids?" Seth asked her. "Jacob will do it." Alice snipped at him, and with that and the door shutting behind them, they were gone from the mansion.

"Now what do we do?" Nessie asked me, looking from her sleeping baby parents, to me.

"We wait for them to come back, of course. For now, let's let your parents sleep." I answered, getting up from my seat. Nessie followed me out to the backyard, and there, we played together with me in my wolf form, waiting out the hours until the others came home.

At around 5, the family came back. Edward and Bella woke up from their nap about an hour ago, and right now, they were being little rugrats because 1) they're hungry - again -, and 2) They need their diapers changed, because right as the others got home, they decided now was the time for them to go. "Thank god! Now, can someone please change these babies and feed them?" I hissed to the vampires, while their noses wrinkled from the smell. "Why didn't you change them, mutt?" Blondie asked, while Carlisle and Esme went over to them and picked them up.

"How long have they been like this?" Carlisle asked me, interrupting our argument. "Not for long actually; right as you guys got home, they uh, went." I explained, scratching the back of my neck. "Good. Leaving babies with full diapers like this, for a long time, is not good for their health. You're lucky we came home when they went." Carlisle explained, then smiled reassuringly to Edward - Carlisle had Edward, and Esme had Bella - who was whimpering. "We better change them soon; poor sweeties." Esme murmured, kissing Bella's forehead and wiping away her tears with a free finger.

"Jasper, Jacob; come with us. Alice and Rosalie, you too." Carlisle called out when he and his wife were going up the stairs. "What? Why?" Rosalie asked. "You four need to come see how to change a diaper, because Esme and I are not going to be around all of the time to do this for you." Carlisle replied. "Why not me? Why can't I watch and learn?" Emmett complained.

"Because, frankly, even though you're his brother, I would rather have Jacob change Edward than you, son." Carlisle remarked bluntly; that sent us all in a laughing frenzy. "Haha! He trusts the wolf over you Emmett!" Jasper howled, laughing.

Emmett grumbled, before he disappeared into the living room to sulk.

We - Civil War Soldier, Pixie, Blondie and I - followed after Dr. Fang and his wife, up the stairs, to Edward's and Bella's bedroom. "You know, I don't know if I want to change any babies' diapers in here. Kind of freaks me out to be in here." I muttered to myself, grimacing at the queen bed. Ick; I'm in the _love chamber_ of Bella and the leech I used to hate. Who knows what went on in - my musings to myself were cut off when Pixie skipped right up to me, and slapped me upside the head.

"OW! Hello; partially human here, you Pixie!" I yelped, holding my head, ignoring the baby giggles from Bella and Edward. "Oh, you'll live. I knew what you were thinking though, mutt. So, do us all a favor, and get your head out of the gutters so you can learn how to change a diaper." Alice ordered, snickering before she turned back around to her parents. "If I get a concussion, I know who to blame it on." I grumbled; I was ignored.

Anyways, learning how to change baby's diapers was absolutely _fun!_ The babies give you rainbows and drops of chocolate! It was a magical experience!

Oh, you detected the sarcasm there? Well, good. Because changing diapers, is not all so fun. It's filled with stinky _surprises_ from the babies', and in our case, we got two blushing babies who were paying no mind to us family members. I so hope Bella and Edward remember this when, and if, they turn back to their normal selves. I could definitely use this as blackmail.

"Well, now that's over with, let's get to the baby fashion show!" Alice cheered once we returned to the living room, with Emmett, Leah and Seth waiting there for us. Nessie came out of the kitchen, with two little bottles of baby food and spoons, ready. I don't know how, but Nessie was becoming a mother figure to her parents very quickly.

Once the words of fashion show came out of Alice's mouth, Bella and Edward's baby faces scrunched up - Edward's in anger, and Bella's in annoyance. "Auntie Alice, do we need to have a fashion show?" Nessie asked the Pixie, raising an eyebrow. "Yes, Nessie. I need to know which outfits are to be kept, and how many outfit combinations can be made. With you shape-shifters here, my visions are all screwy so it's not like I can see the outcomes so well; hence, a fashion show is needed!" Alice stated in a determined attitude.

"Fine. But not for too long, Auntie Alice. I mean, my parents are babies, so if they're shoved through too many clothes, they'll become fussy." Nessie reminded her after Carlisle and Esme set Bella and Edward down on the couch. From there, the fashion show began while Alice had sent us guys off to assemble the crib, the changing table, the high chairs, and the stroller. It may seem like a piece of cake, but for us and our inexperience of babies, it was difficult.

I had went downstairs for a drink break, and with Seth following behind me, we entered the living room, only to burst out laughing. Baby clothes were everywhere, and the ladies looked frazzled. "Clothes icky!" Bella cried in her baby voice, from the couch. She was holding a fru-fru dress, but then she threw it down on the couch, and huffed. Edward, who was sitting beside her in a pile of... pants, laughed a baby giggle at her behavior.

"Momma's been throwing a temper tantrum ever since Alice had dressed her in her fifth dress." Nessie remarked from the armrest of the couch, giggling. "She's hopeless! Bella has no taste in fashion - even as a baby, she doesn't like clothes!" Alice wailed, popping up from underneath a pile of shirts. "Well, maybe the little bugger doesn't want to wear - OW! Damn it, Jasper!" Emmett yelled from upstairs.

"I knew where you were heading, so don't even finish that thought out loud." Jasper growled.

"Gals, maybe I can help." Seth inputted, walking up to Bella. "Hey Bella," Seth began; Bella looked up at him with big brown eyes. "You like this?" Seth asked, holding up a frilly dress. Bella's little pouty lips puckered, and she shook her head. "Do you like this?" Seth asked, holding up a cotton dress; it looked cute, yet it wasn't too frilly. Bella's face smoothed out into a thinking kind of face, before she nodded.

"Unbelievable! She throws a fit over every dress we show her, and yet, my brother goes up to her, and gets her to actually choose a dress calmly!" Leah exclaimed, popping up and out from a pile of shoes. "Tank you, Sethy!" Bella cried, giggling up at Seth. "Yeah, thank you, _Sethy_." I sneered, laughing at Seth, who shrugged.

A while later, plenty of clothes, outfit combinations, shoe and sock combinations, etc., were done and over with. Just in time too; the guys upstairs had finished assembling all of the baby items that were needed, and with the toys they had gotten for them stored away, we brought Bella and Edward up to their new nursery. "Look Momma and Daddy! Your new room!" Nessie cried to her parents once we all entered the room.

"Oooh!" her parents "oohed" and "ahhed" while looking around their colorful new nursery. One thing is for sure; the Cullen men know how to paint fast.

"Well, I think we should put these two down for some sleep." Esme suggested, putting Bella down in the large crib. Carlisle also put Edward down in the crib. Edward crawled his way over to Bella, and plopped himself beside her. They lied down together, with Esme tucking the blanket around them. And once again, Bella cuddled up to her husband, let out a yawn at the same time Edward did, and closing their eyes, the two went to sleep.

Alice skipped forward, and clicked a button on the mobile above the crib; Bella's lullaby that Edward composed for her, came through. "You'd be surprised how easy it is to cram three piano compositions into that little mobile." Alice informed me once I stared at her, surprised. I didn't even know you could have your own music on a mobile.

The family made their way out of the room, with Esme turning the light off. "I'll think I'll stay here and watch over my Momma and Daddy." Nessie said, skipping back over to the crib. See? What did I tell you? Mother figure. And naturally, her being my imprint, I decided to stay with her as well.

I sat down in the rocking chair, while Nessie grabbed the toy chest in here and dragged it over to the crib's edge, before she hopped up on it, and then hovered over her parents.

"Nessie, what are you doing?" I asked her, chuckling quietly. "Watching my parents sleep; what else?" Nessie replied, looking over at me minutely before she looked back at her parents.

"You don't need to be a stalker eagle, Nessie sweetie." I reminded her, and she once again shrugged. "You know, you'll have to fall asleep sometime." I reminded her once more. "I know; I'll find something in here to sleep on. Don't worry, Jakey." Nessie giggled, shaking her head over at me.

I sighed just as Nessie's lullaby came on. My eyes started drooping, and soon, I fell asleep.

**~*~*~*E&B*~*~*~**

**~Esme Cullen~**

"Ha! Beat you again, brother!" Jasper, my strategic son, yelled out victoriously. I looked up from my home and interior magazine, to see that Jasper had beaten Emmett at that war game once more. I shook my head at their antics, and looked at the clock. It read _9:48 pm_. I stood up from the couch, setting the magazine down on the coffee table, and made my way out of the living room. "Where are you going love?" Carlisle asked from his spot that was next to my spot on the couch.

"I'm going to check on Bella, Edward, Nessie and Jacob, honey. I'll be back soon." I said to him softly, making my way up the stairs to the nursery. I stopped at the door, listening in on the noises inside. I heard one irregular heartbeat that was thumping steadily, and three normal hearts that were slowly thumping. I opened the door slowly, and stepped inside the room, closing the door behind me once I was inside. I saw Jacob asleep on the rocking chair, and Nessie was asleep on top of a toy chest by the crib.

I smiled; our Nessie was starting to become a mother figure to her baby parents. She was so protective and watchful of them, that she fell asleep on her job. I made my way over to her, and picked her up, cradling her. She cuddled into me, murmuring something incoherently in her sleep. _Just like how Bella slept._ I thought to myself while I placed her down in the play pen that was in here. Even though nothing has happened to Bella and Edward yet, I would rather have them play together safely in this play pen.

I got a blanket that was in one of the drawers of the dresser in here for clothes purposes - I blame Alice for her overstock of clothes - and draped the blanket over him. Then I made my way over to the crib. "Aww." I whispered, giggling. Edward, my little boy, had his thumb in his mouth, while Bella, the sweetheart that she is, was suddenly awake and stroking Edward's little head. "Bella love, why are you up?" I whispered to her, and she looked up at me. "I hungy, but me no leavy my Edar." Bella murmured, looking lovingly down at her sleeping husband.

"I'll be right back, sweetie." I whispered, and dashed out quietly of the nursery. I made my way into the kitchen to see Carlisle had went in there. "Bella's hungry?" he asked; he heard - the cheat. "Yes." I answered, laughing. Carlisle smiled, and gave me the Gerber's cup of yogurt, along with a cup of applesauce. "I think Edward is going to wake up soon, hungry as well." Carlisle told me when I looked at him questioningly.

"Thank you." I murmured, kissing his lips quickly. I then dashed up the stairs back to the nursery. When I entered, Bella was standing and using the crib's bars for support, and Edward was waking up. "Momma!" Bella giggled, waving to me. My heart warmed at those words. Even though everyone in this household called me Esme, I would be thrilled when someone would slip up and call me Mom. And, now hearing those words from my daughter-in-law who's a baby, just made me feel like I was on top of the world.

"Hey there, Bella, Edward. Want to eat?" I asked them. They nodded eagerly with their little stomachs gurgling. I picked them up, and made my way over to the high chairs that the others left in here. I set Bella down in one, and Edward in the other; it's a good thing I'm a vampire so I can juggle two babies.

"Edward, would you like the applesauce?" I asked him. His face scrunched up and he shook his head. "Want the yogurt?" I asked him, and then he nodded. I opened the yogurt, and open the jar of applesauce, before I began feeding Edward and Bella their foods. When they were almost done, a flash of light went off, along with the sound of a button being pressed.

I looked over at the doorway, to see Alice standing there, holding up a camera. "Thought you'd want to scrap book these baby moments." Alice said sheepishly, smiling at me. "You bet." I answered, laughing quietly.

After my daughter-in-law and son finished eating, I put them back in their crib and they went to sleep. I made sure the mobile was still on, and after turning on the little crib night-light, I left the room with a smile on my face.

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**So, that was the best I could type out.**

**The writer's block that I have, is still bad, especially since I'm sick. :(**

**It really sucks. :( I can't type out anything without getting stuck. :( **

**Please let me know what you thought of the chapter, in a review please!**

**Bye for now,**

**~*Lady Lily of Darkness*~ **


	4. AN: Sorry!

**A/N: Hey there readers!**

**Now, I know that I've been MIA for a long time lately. But, I just want all of you to know that I am alive, and trying my best in typing out new chapters for all of you.**

**Unfortunately, my writer's block has come to the point of major annoyance, that I'm sorry but I have to put **Momma and Daddy Are What?** on Hiatus. Just for now. I'm not deleting this story, because I love it and I believe that I will get an idea for it eventually, but the ideas are coming, so the story will have to sit untouched for a while until I have an idea for a new chapter. :P**

**And, also, I'll be doing something new. :)**

**All of you who know my stories and read **_The List_** from DoT, know that I said I would write out those stories in that order, okay? Well, I decided to mix it up actually. Basically, after I'm finished with my short stories, I'll be jumping around on that list of mine. You never know; after the short stories, I could jump down to **Reality of Our Lives**, or I could go to **HSNE, A Remake**. ;)**

**But, even with me jumping around the list, once I've chosen the random number, I'll stick to that story until it's all finished! So really, nothing has changed. XD**

**And, finally, I have one last thing to share with all of you.**

**During my MIA of new chapter updates for all of you, I have been making lots of Story Banners lately. Last time you have heard from me, I told y'all that the HSNE Banner was up on my second website - "Lily-Rose-FanFiction". Now, I've done at least 9 more banners. XD**

**The 9 other banners that I did are:**

-_CSI: Crime Scene Investigation - After Life_

_-The Prince and the Tattoo Artist _

_-White, Green and In Between_

_-The Twilight Mafia_

_-Ever Wondering Mind_

_-My Edar_

_-Vampires On Waverly Place: Twilight Version_

_-Death's Heart*_

_-The Angel of Life_

***Death's Heart is a new one-shot that I'll be posting soon once I've finished it. :)**

**So, after I post the one-shot mentioned above, possibly, a new update of the next story on the list, will either be directly after the posting of **Death's Heart**, or during winter break. :)**

**Happy Holidays from me, and please be patient for the next update of the next story on **_The __List_**. :D**

**Bye for now,**

**~*Lady Lily of Darkness*~ **


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